America. WTF??
OK, so, as you know, the assessment has been postponed. A telephone pre-hearing is scheduled, in place of the original hearing; so as to address procedural issues in giving out our subpoenas. For one, they claim the subpoenas...all 12 of them, issued to Methodist Hospital, were all invalid, and in bad need o' Quashing. For those of you unfamiliar with that term, it means, really, Squashing. Don't ask me why the law decided to drop the S, or why the common man added it, but it pretty much means the same thing. Those subpoenaes were BAD. Nonononono. Can't be coming, served like this. Never mind that the father called ahead of time to find out what was good and what wasn't. See, the real point, is that no one from Methodist wishes to attend this little te-da-te. No, that would mean that the father would have a field day with the testimony of the Docs and RN's...and we can't have that! That would mean I could open a can of proverbial whoop-a** on them. I might file a civil suit! Ummmmmmmmmmmm....
Liddle late for that, init? (See The Affidavit of Truth, below)
You've already done opened that can guys. No stopping that now, that was the plan from day UNO. Yeah, you're on. And so am I.
So, here's their motion to Quash...followed quickly by my motion to SQUASH their Quash. Let's see how they like this one, hay?
First, the subpoena, issued by the ALJ:
NOTE: All of these subpoenaes, as well as the legal doc from Methodist's bigger badder law firm, came to me on paper and in type that was worse than dot-matrix quality. I could barely see it, let alone read it. Not only that, but after reading and looking at the format, and going over their logic, I thought about asking them for a job just writing up their motions. As much as this firm makes, surely, representing someone like Unity Point, a statewide healthcare company, they must pay the girl who wrote it a pretty penny, for what can only be called the worst motion I've ever read, formatted the worst way possible. C'mon Finley, Alt, Smith, Scharnberg, Craig, Hilmes & Gaffney, P.C., I've only been doin' this for 8 months, and mine looks and sounds more professional. Ms. Connie L. Diekema? I'd suggest a trip back to paralegal school.
Probably the thing I LOVE MOST about their little doc is this: The undue burden our unimportant case is heaping onto the schedules of these poor busy doctors and nurses. Maybe they wouldn't be running around like busy little beavers all day if they had less lawsuits to answer to. Don't you just admire the portion that refers to how busy they are in their respective "Jobs"?? Evidently the rest of America doesn't have this problem. No, we have nothing better to do with OUR lives but attend the very hearings caused by how evil you were in reporting these parents, at the behest of DHS/CPS...in order to bring in half the profits when "Reasonable efforts" are later offered us in order to "reunify" us, via the avenues of MANDATED follow-up appointments with your doctors at Blank/Methodist, Visiting Nurse Services, and any other pies you might have your crusty fingers stuck in. Bastards. LYING CHEATING SONOFABITCHES....get your ass in court and tell the truth, or I will drag this on until you do...understand???? The rest of America isn't any less busy than you are, so quit making excuses and comply, or this won't happen until you do...and your wallets are empty, and your hospital a distant memory. I've got a list of questions that will tear your little busy lives into itty shreds, and you will NOT get out of it, until I've had my day in the sun. PERIOD.
Tell you what, I'll make you the same offer I made the rest of the little members of my list. Say you lied in order to make money for yourselves, DHS and the state, so we can get our daughter back, and I might just let you get away with it...for a year or so. Final offer. Otherwise, you'll just be attached to the "Bruce Bitchlist", just like the rest of the gang. Feel me?
Finally, America, I bring you the snakes that defend Methodist/Unity Point in their actions, when they decide to collude with DHS and steal children. We'll see how long they last in U.S. Court against me.
Alt. Isn't that a key on my keyboard??
Finley. Someone really needs to tell these guys that Bowties went out in the 70's.
Smith. Here, here's a buck. Buy yourself a new last name, willya?
And you wonder where I get my hatred of snakepits like this firm? Riiiiiiight.
Connie L. Diekema - Ain't the web mahvelous dahling?
